LEO

I just know I need to get something very important from that old building somewhere I hardly recognize. I just got to get inside one of those rooms there and reclaim what I believe is mine. It looked to me a very old building but I'm just too lucky to get there when it is being emptied out for refurbishment. In one of the rooms, fortunately sat untouched what I went back there for - some sort of a tiny box with some stuff in it I seriously don't even know what. Hurrying and heading back to the main door with the box as inside was a real mess when just as I stepped out I thought I went past someone fiddling with the windows at the right side of the door. I stepped back in to see and find out if he was by any chance someone I knew as I got a strong feeling he surely could. Would be good to know He wore a dark blue short-sleeved shirt with matching blue trousers and trainers. He stood there all looking fit and happy. I moved closer for a better view when tears just suddenly welled up in my eyes and went running down my cheeks, keeping up with the pain and anger and resentment I felt right that very moment as I fathomed who he was! I called his name in a hurting voice. No answer. He didn't even look to my direction. I called his name again, twice, moving closer to where he was. He finally looked at me and gladly smiled the same smile he used to give me.

"Hi! You're here! And why are you crying?" Gosh, I couldn't even remember the last time I heard his voice.

"Because I miss you, I really, really miss you! Very much!" Then I absolutely lost it and burst into tears - the biggest and the saddest of all tears I ever cried for him.

"Ahh, come here." And he wrapped me in his arms so tight I wished it would last forever but before I could get drowned in my own tears and in the feeling of mad sadness, I felt my shoulders shaken and my arm gently rubbed.

"Wake up, you're dreaming", was what I heard from my husband who was with me in bed, watching me with my struggle from when he noticed I am choking into some difficult dream, waiting for the right time and sign to help bring me back to reality. But I was still in the same state of what seemed like emotional sadness, still crying the same intensity as I told him about that tearful encounter with Manong Leo, my closest and bestest cousin and friend, through my sleep and who we lost to a nasty death nearly 5 years ago and until now I detest why he had to leave - me most of all. And every time I'm sad, I still call for him and wished he were here. I MISS YOU MANONG MORE THAN ANYONE KNOWS. YOU ARE ALWAYS ALIVE TO ME.